Anime Review – Infinite Stratos

Infinite-Stratos-Series-ImageInfinite Stratos is the Lynx deodorant of anime. Now you may be thinking – did he really just compare an anime series to a can of deodorant? To give the short answer – yes. Yes I did. But before you rightfully think i’ve lost the plot you should hear me out – this odd connection between aerosol and anime is stronger than you may think. And in case you’re wondering – you indeed should get ready for a few hundred words comparing Lynx deodorant to Infinite Stratos. I’ll make it fun though. Promise!

Connection one: Both present an unrealistic and frustratingly stupid story

Commonplace among both Infinite Statos and Lynx is the promise that “this is how you get girls.” Don’t listen. It’s not. If you want to get girls run away from both of these things right now! It may help to think of them as an eternal cock block.

They both hinge on appealing to the desperate male – and it leads you to constantly cringe as you watch. In Infinite Stratos especially we have one male character, Ichika Orimura, surrounded by a squad of desperate girls who all fall in love with him because they have no other option for a love interest (literally there are no other males in the cast). The main character isn’t even special – he doesn’t do anything to win them over, he just…exists. Think of him like your average-sized tree in a forest.

In terms of the point of the anime and the main plot line I honestly couldn’t tell you. Not because I didn’t pay attention, but because it was incredibly unclear and often overshadowed by the worst, and potentially only, love hexagon in anime existence.

And I can assure you – once you’ve spent half of every episode watching the same desperation by the same five girls on repeat you will start to get over it. Which leads me to connection two.

Yes. The Orimura himself (the only man). Just so you know he lacks a personality. Source: 8bit
Yes. The Orimura himself (the only man). Just so you know he lacks a personality.    Source: 8bit

Connection two: They’re both highly annoying

Just like an uninspiring Lynx ad that pops up on TV and makes you question life, Infinite Stratos offers you nothing. In fact I wouldn’t be surprised if this anime was known to induce headaches, like running into a brick wall would.

Every character is bland, incessantly irritating and has a questionable purpose. I would say they’re cookie cutter characters but that would be too kind. They’ve essentially made one annoying sub-par character, cloned them a million times, and then repackaged them with a different hair colour, voice and occasionally a random trait that means nothing.

Usually people speak of their favourite character. But unfortunately when it comes to Infinite Stratos the question shifts to “who did I hate the least.” That title goes to Charlotte Dunois – she was slightly less crap than the rest. This being said don’t have high expectations because they won’t be filled.

Look at the man on the right. The pain he's in is on par with the pain you will be in watching this anime. Source: 8bit
Look at the man on the right. The pain he’s in is on par with the pain you will be in watching this anime.    Source: 8bit

Connection three: They’re both packaged horribly

Did you ever see Lynx deodorant in store and think…that doesn’t appeal to me. I mean – the short stubby can coupled with the “trying too hard to be cool” vibe doesn’t quite shout “buy me!” (Also…cans can’t talk). Alas, the “packaging” situation is the same in Infinite Stratos.

The art is generic, and the animation isn’t anything special. If anything it feels a little clunky. While some bits are ok it’s by no means a stand out and for an anime released in 2010 it’s safe to say that it could do a little better.

Also worth noting is that no matter how dangerous a fight no body ever gets hurt in the end. Source: 8bit
Also worth noting is that no matter how dangerous a fight is no body ever actually gets injured.    Source: 8bit

Connection four: They should be avoided at all costs

Both hinge on highly sexualised and annoying methods to try rope people in. The bottom line is that they try and sell the idea of sex in a pathetic way, and the only people getting roped in are the people you probably don’t want to be.

So, to sum up. Feel free to never watch Infinite Stratos. I promise, you’re not missing out on anything.

Thank you for reading my review!

Rating 3.5/10

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